Month: February 2021

Newsletter Purim – Shushan Purim – Parashat Tetzave

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Have a look at our website www.moorlane.info  
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Matanot Laevyonim
 
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Purim Guidance
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Congratulations to everyone who studied Megillat Esther in our joint learning:

 R’ Mord Maman, R’ Namir, Daniel Tichbi, R’ Shmuel Livshin, Rafi Marshall, R’ Stamler, Antony Hodari, R’ Aharon Gillis, Dr Yehuda Marshall, R’ David Shasha, Ben Hassan, R’ Moshe Wieder, Yaakov Dozetas, Eric Sievers, R’ David Schlama, Fabian Borocin.                    

Chazak ve’ematz!

Attached to this email are some Divre Torah on the megilla, inspired by our learning.

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with 
Rabbi Oppenheimer
learning 
Masechet Berachot
25 minutes before Korbanot
*****
Times for this week
Shacharit
Sunday
Korbanot 7:50 am Hodu 8.00 am
Mincha & Arbit 3:30 pm
Monday, Thursday & Friday
 6.55
Hodu: 7.05    Barechu: 7.15
Tues, Wed, Fri 
7.00
Hodu: 7.10   Barechu: 7.20
Arbit 
Monday – Thursday
7:00 pm
Please support our minyanim whenever possible!
Updates will appear on the WhatsApp group image.png
If anyone needs any help getting to or from the minyanim 
please contact one of the members of the Mahamad
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  End of the Winter Season Avot Ubanim
but optional for parents & children to continue
A big Chazak Ubaruch to
Rafi Marshall
&
Yehoshua Lewis
for all their hard work every week
 to make it such a great success

Dvar Torah

Davs Marshall

Prizes
Shmulli Borocin
Michael Bitton
Gabi Weinberg
Shlomo Lewis
 *****
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 Purim  
Ruining and Regaining Opportunity 
HaGaon Rabbi Yaakov Hillel – Straight from the Heart
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Sefardic World
Researching Jewish communities around the Mediterranean is challenging. Many archives have been destroyed, lost or confiscated. However, the records of the Alliance Israélite Universelle sit safely in Paris.

The Alliance Israélite Universelle was founded in 1860 by a group of French Jews, the majority of them being Ashkenazim from Alsace. However, the school network of the AIU had a decisive effect on Judeo-Spanish populations in Turkey,  Greece, the Balkans and North Africa. The library and archives are full of important documents for the history of the Sephardim: manuscripts, early prints, periodicals, and many references to Sephardic individuals who acted as teachers of the AIU. Discover the richness of these collections, and learn how to access it through the digital library.

Jean-Claude Kuperminc is the Director of the Library and Archives of the Alliance Israélite Universelle. He is one of the creators of the Rachel Network of Jewish Libraries. In more than 30 years, he has led the transformation of the library into the digital world.

Many thanks to our regular and new patrons. We couldn't do this without you. The popularity of Sephardic World means that we are now often over-subscribed and may soon need to restrict Zoom meetings to patrons. Please consider joining our patrons in making a small monthly donation to help keep the show on the road! https://www.patreon.com/sephardi 

The meeting is today, Sunday 28 February 2021 at 11am LA, 2pm NYC, 7pm London, 8pm Amsterdam and 9pm Jerusalem. Join us on Zoom at: https://us02web.zoom.us/j/85733122136

If you cannot get into the meeting we have an overflow at: https://www.facebook.com/sephardicgenealogy 
Best wishes,

Ton and David

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COVID – 19 SUPPORT
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לוח זמני תפלה לחורף תשפ״א

מוצאי שבת

ערבית
)מוצ“ש(

שקיעה

מנחה שבת

סוף זמן קריאת שמע

הדלקת נרות

מנחה וקבלת שבת

תאריך

שבת פרשת

Shabbat

Ends

Arbit

Sunset

Minha

Shema before

Candle Lighting

Minha & Kabbalat Shabbat

Date

Parasha

PM

PM

PM

PM

AM

PM

PM

 

 

6:32

6:30

5:42

5:05

9:41

5:26

5:26

26/27 Feb

תצוה


Q & A on Parashat Tetazve

  1. What two precautions were taken to assure the purity of the oil for the menorah?
    27:20 – The olives were pressed and not ground; and only the first drop was used.
  2. How was Aharon commanded to kindle the menorah?
    27:20 – He was commanded to kindle it until the flame ascended by itself.
  3. What does tamid mean in reference to the menorah?
    27:20 – It means that it should be kindled every night.
  4. What does kehuna mean?
    28:3 – Service.
  5. Name the eight garments worn by the Kohen Gadol.
    28:4,36,42 – Choshen, ephod, me'il, ketonet, mitznefet, avnet, tzitz, and michnasayim.
  6. To what does Rashi compare the ephod?
    28:6 – A woman's riding garment.
  7. In which order were the names of the Tribes inscribed on the ephod?
    28:10 – In order of birth.
  8. The stones of the ephod bore the inscription of the names of the sons of Yaakov. Why?
    28:12 – So that G-d would see their names and recall their righteousness.
  9. For what sins did the choshen mishpat atone?
    28:15 – For judicial errors.
  10. What are three meanings of the word mishpat?
    1. 28:15 –
    (a) The claims of the litigants
    (b) The court's ruling
    (c) The court's punishment.
  11. What was lacking in the bigdei kehuna in the second Beit Hamikdash?
    28:30 – The Urim V'Tumim — the “Shem Ha'meforash” placed in the folds of the choshen.
  12. Which garment's fabric was woven of only one material?
    28:31 – The fabric of the me'il was made only of techelet.
  13. When the Kohen Gadol wore all his priestly garments, where on his head was the tefillin situated?
    28:37 – Between the tzitz and the mitznefet.
  14. What does the word tamid mean in reference to the tzitz? (two answers)
    28:38 –
    (a) It always atones, even when not being worn.
    (b) The Kohen Gadol must always be aware that he is wearing it.
  15. Which garments were worn by a kohen hediot?
    28:40,42 – Ketonet, avnet, migba'at and michnasayim.
  16. During the inauguration of the kohanim, a bullock was brought as a sin offering. For what sin did this offering atone?
    29:1 – The sin of the golden calf.
  17. Moshe was commanded to wash Aharon and his sons to prepare them to serve as kohanim (29:4). How were they washed?
    29:4 – They immersed in a mikveh.
  18. What was unique about the bull sin-offering brought during the inauguration of the kohanim?
    29:14 – It is the only external sin-offering that was completely burned.
  19. How did the oil used for the meal-offering differ from the oil used for the menorah?
    29:40 – Oil for the menorah comes only from beaten olives. Oil for meal-offerings may come from either beaten olives or from ground-up olives.
  20. What does the crown on the mizbeach haketoret symbolize?
    30:3 – The crown of kehuna.

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Halachot from Maran Rabbi Ovadia Yosef Ztz'l

מתנות לאביונים


בהלכה
הקודמת

,
ביארנו
באופן כללי את חיוב מצות “מתנות לאביונים” ביום פורים. כלומר, לתת שתי
מתנות לשני אביונים.

מה
צריך לתת?
ומצות
מתנות לאביונים, אינה דוקא במתנות ממש, אלא רשאי לתת לאביונים מעות (כסף) כדי
שיוכלו לקנות ממנו צרכי סעודת פורים.

כמה
צריך לתת?
ירא
שמים יתן מתנות לאביונים בעין יפה ובסבר פנים יפות, והנה שכרו ופעולתו לפניו. וכמה
הוא חיוב מתנות לאביונים?, הנה מעיקר הדין אין קצבה במעות פורים, כי מן הדין די
בנתינת פרוטה, שהוא סכום הקטן שיש בכל מקום (וכגון בארץ ישראל מטבע של חצי שקל
וכדומה), ומכל מקום כאמור, עדיף להרבות במתנות לאביונים, מלהרבות בסעודת פורים
ובמשלוח מנות. ועל כל פנים נכון שלא יפחות מסכום שיוכל האביון לעשות ממנו סעודת פורים.

החילוק
בין משלוח מנות למתנות לאביונים
בהלכה
הקודמת ביארנו, שיש לתת את המשלוח מנות, באופן שהמקבל ידע ממי קיבלת את המעות,
והנותן ידע למי נותן. וזאת משום שטעם המצוה של משלוח מנות, הוא בכדי להרבות אהבה
ואחוה בין בני אדם. אולם לענין מתנות לאביונים אין הדין כן, אלא רשאי לתת את
המתנות באופן שהאביון לא ידע ממי קיבל, וכן הנותן לא ידע למי נותן.

וכן
במשלוח מנות, יש לתת מנות ממש, כלומר, דברי מאכל ומשקה, מה שאין כן במתנות
לאביונים, שיכול לתת לאביונים מעות, שיוכל לקנות מהם את צרכי הסעודה.

חשיבות
מתנות לאביונים
וכתב
הרמב”ם (הלכות מגילה פרק ב), חייב אדם לשלוח לחברו שתי מנות בשר, או שני מיני
תבשיל, או שני מיני אוכלים (מאכלים), שנאמר: ומשלוח מנות איש לרעהו,
שתי
מנות לאיש אחד, וכל המרבה לשלוח לרעים הרי זה משובח. וחייב לחלק לעניים מעות או
מיני אכלים ביום הפורים, לא פחות משני עניים, שנותן לכל אחד מתנה אחת, שנאמר:
ומתנות לאביונים. ומוטב לאדם להרבות במתנות לאביונים יותר מלהרבות בסעודתו ובמשלוח
מנות לחברים, שאין שמחה גדולה מפוארה יותר מלשמח לב עניים ויתומים ואלמנות וגרים,
שהמשמח לב האומללים הללו, הרי הוא דומה לשכינה, שנאמר: “להחיות רוח שפלים
ולהחיות נפש נדכאים“.

נתינה
לגבאי צדקה
הנותן
מעות לגבאי צדקה, שהוא מחלקם לעניים בו ביום, יוצא ידי חובת מתנות לאביונים,
ששלוחו של אדם כמותו. וכן נוהגים רבים כיום, שהם נותנים לגבאי נאמן את כספי המתנות
לאביונים, והוא שלוחם לתת את כספי המתנות לעניים ביום הפורים. ועדיף לנהוג כן ממה
שיתן בעצמו את המעות, לאביונים כאלה אשר אינו יכול לדעת בודאות אם הם ראויים
למתנות אלו.

וכבר
הזהרנו בעבר על הצורך לשים לב שגבאי הצדקה הם אנשים יראי שמים, ולא לסמוך בעיניים
עצומות על ועדי הצדקה למיניהם

Matanot La’Evyonim

In
the previous
Halacha we briefly discussed the Mitzvah of “Matanot La’Evyonim”
on Purim day which is the distribution of two monetary gifts, one to each pauper.

The Rambam (Chapter 2 of Hilchot Megilla) writes: “One must send his friend two
portions of meat or two cooked foods or two food items, as the verse states,
‘And sending portions to one another,’ which means two potions to one person.
The more friends one sends to, the more praiseworthy he is. One must also
distribute monetary gifts or food items to the poor on Purim day, no less than
one gift to two poor people, as the verse states, ‘And gifts to the poor’. It
is more important for one to distribute more gifts to the poor than to spend a
lot on one’s feast or send gifts to many friends, for there is no greater and
more splendid happiness than to gladden the hearts of the poor, orphans,
widows, and converts; one who gladdens these downtrodden souls is comparable to
the holy presence of Hashem Himself, as the verse states, ‘To revive the spirit
of the downtrodden and to revive the soul of the oppressed.’”

One who fears Heaven should distribute Matanot La’Evyonim generously and with
good cheer and his reward will be great indeed. How much must a person give as
Matanot La’Evyonim? Although the letter of the law dictates that there is no
set amount for this gift and one fulfills his obligation by giving even a few
cents per pauper, nevertheless, it is preferable to spend more on Matanot
La’Evyonim then on the Purim feast or Mishloach Manot. (One should preferably
give enough so that the pauper will be able to make use of the sum for the
Purim feast.)

One who gives money to a charity treasurer who will subsequently distribute
this sum to the needy on Purim day on the donor’s behalf has fulfilled his
obligation, since “one’s messenger is like himself.” This is the prevalent
custom today as many people give their Matanot La’Evyonim to trustworthy treasurers
and they in turn distribute the money on the donors’ behalf on Purim day. It is
actually proper to fulfill the Mitzvah in this way rather than to give the
money to such people whom one cannot ascertain whether or not they are
genuinely needy.

However, we must warn our readers that when one gives these monetary gifts to
charity treasurers, one should take extreme caution to give only to treasurers
who are trustworthy and G-d-fearing, for we have heard of situations where
there have been individuals who have stolen the majority of the proceeds for
themselves and taken advantage of the plight of the truly downtrodden in order
amass wealth for themselves. Hagaon Ya’abetz writes in his Sefer Megillat Sefer
(about three hundred years ago) that most of the charity collected for the poor
of Jerusalem had been stolen by the charity treasurers who would pass the funds
from hand to hand and became rich in this way while not leaving even a fraction
of the proceeds for the poor people of Jerusalem, which eventually lead to the
collapse of the Ashkenazi community in Jerusalem. Similarly, we are clearly
aware of several organizations that collect money on behalf of widows and
orphans and keep all the proceeds for themselves, leaving only a tiny sum over
for the intended recipients. These greedy individuals who steal from the mouths
of the poor present themselves as righteous and upstanding individuals; as
such, one must be keen in order to avoid them. Anyone who cherishes his soul
should distance himself from such people in addition to warning others about
them, for donating to such individuals does not constitute Tzedakah at all. One
should give his Matanot La’Evyonim and all other Tzedakah for that matter only
to treasurers who are completely trustworthy and G-d-fearing or to Torah
scholars who are in charge of passing the charity on to G-d-fearing individuals
themselves.

We recommend giving donations to one’s local, G-d-fearing rabbi who will then
distribute the proceeds to the poor

 


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Newsletter Parashat Yitro – Aseret Hadiberot – Shabbat Mevarechim

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Have a look at our website www.moorlane.info  
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THIS week is Shabbat Yitro
where we read the 
עשרת הדיברות
10 Commandments
&
It is also
Shabbat Mevarechim
*****
NEXT WEEK
3 SEFARIM
Shabbat Mishpatim
Shabbat Rosh Chodesh
Parashat Shekalim
Haftara of 
1) Shekalim 
2) 1st & last Pasuk of Rosh Chodesh
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Minhagim

‘Aseret HaDiberot – The Ten Commandments

It is the minhag of all Jews from North Africa, as well as our brothers, the Ashkenazim, to stand up during the reading of the ‘Aseret HaDiberot (the Ten Commandments) on Shabu’ot, Shabat Yitro, and Shabat VaEthanan, to commemorate the time when Yisrael stood at Har Sinai as if we are once again welcoming the face of the Shekhina (Divine Presence) and accepting the Tora.[1]

However, Rambam[2] writes not to stand for the ‘aseret hadiberot because the heretics will claim, “we only attribute importance to these ten misvot as they are the only ones that are true; the rest of the Tora is not true,” has veshalom. The reason we continue to follow this minhag, is because the heretics at the time of Rambam were much different then the heretics of today as heretics of today do not make such claims.[3] Ribi Shalom Messas[4] is also of this opinion and explains further that whether we were to remain seated or we stood during the ‘aseret hadiberot it would not change the perception of the heretics; either way they would find ways to deny the Tora. Also, it is clear that since we continue to read the remainder of the parasha – and not solely the ‘aseret hadiberot – there is no reason to worry about such claims.[5] Ribi Yehuda ‘Ayash of Algeria is also of this opinion and writes that the claims of the heretics could only persuade an ignoramus of nowadays using such logic.[6] Furthermore, Maran HaHida[7] explains that since we make berakhot before and after each ‘aliya latora – and not just the ‘aliya of the ‘aseret hadiberot – we have no worry that heretics will make a claim that the rest of the Tora is untrue.

Maran HaHida[8] cautions us, however, to stand from the beginning of the ‘aliya in order to show that we stand for other pesuqim as well. He also adds that it is very important that if the majority of the congregation is standing, one is NOT allowed to sit, as this illustrates a belittlement of the ‘Aseret HaDiberot, G-d forbid. Nonetheless, the majority of Moroccan posqim write that the common minhag is to stand only upon reaching the ‘Aseret HaDiberot for we are not concerned about the claims of the heretics at all.[9]

It was the tradition to gather women together and read them these Ten Commandments, in Arabic “ ‘Asr Klmat,” along with its explanation according to Hazal.[10]

Certain parts of the parasha are read in a special tune, among them the ‘Aseret HaDiberot and the Shirat HaYam in order to ascribe special importance to these sections of the Tora as they speak about the high spiritual level of Bené Yisrael and not, has veshalom, to say that they are more important than the rest of the Tora.[11]

 

 The minhag of Spanish Portuguese synagogues & communities is to STAND during the reading of the Aseret Hadiberot

[1] As the Tora says “they were standing at a distance.” This minhag is cited by Dibré Shalom VeEmet (Heleq 2, p.72). Sefer Mamlekhet Kohanim records that this was also the minhag in Djerba and mainland Tunisia, Noheg BeHokhma p.143, QS”A Toledano (Siman 442:9), Yehavé Da’at Hazan (Heleq 3, O”H, Siman 13), Maté Yehuda ‘Ayash (Siman 1:6), Dabar Shemuel by Ribi Shemuel Abuhab (Siman 276), Kapé Aharon (Siman 39), and Sedé Hemed (Kelalé HaPosqim, Siman 5:14). In Shemesh Umaghen (Heleq 1, O”H, Siman 57, p.130) Ribi Shalom Messas solidifies our custom to stand based on the fact that today we do not have the same type of heretics that they had in the times of Hazal and because of whom this minhag was spoken out fiercely against. Maran HaHida (LeDavid Emet Siman 7:5) further says that one should stand in order to stir feelings of fear and trepidation as were felt at Har Sinai.


Those who speak out against this practice do so because to a foreigner it might seem as if the ‘Aseret HaDiberot are more important than the rest of the Tora. This gives reason for the heretics to believe that only the ‘Aseret HaDiberot were given at Har Sinai and not the rest of the Tora which is not the truth, has veshalom.
 

[2] In his handwritten responsa that was compiled along with approximately 367 other responses in 1934. (Siman 46).

[3] Ribi Moshé Feinstein’s response, Igerot Moshé (Heleq 4, O”H Siman 22).

[4] Shemesh Umaghen (Heleq 1, O”H Siman 57 p.130-1) and (Heleq 3, O”H Siman 55:3).

[5] Maghen Abot (Siman 1, p.53-4): Diné Hashqamat HaBoqer.

[6] Maté Yehuda (Siman 1:6).

[7] LeDavid Emet (Siman 7:5).

[8] Toub ‘Ayin (Siman 11).

[9] Ribi Yehuda ‘Ayash of Algeria (Maté Yehuda Siman 1:6), Ribi Yishaq Hazan (Yehavé Da’at, Heleq 3, Siman 13), Ribi Yosef Messas in Osar HaMikhtabim (Heleq 3, §1859), and HaMalakh Refael Berdugo as quoted by the QS”A of Ribi Refael Barukh Toledano (p.174), all say that the common minhag is to stand only once we reach the ‘Aseret HaDiberot. This is also the minhag of Tunisia (Mamlekhet Kohanim) and Libya (Netibot HaMa’arab, Shabu’ot §12).

[10] This is to make the Tora more pleasant to them, and with this they should be more helpful to their husbands in facilitating their Tora learning. See Nahagu Ha’Am (Shabu’ot §5, p.57) as the source and for the lyrics in Arabic.

[11] See Noheg BeHokhma (p.145 §13).

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with 
Rabbi Oppenheimer
learning 
Masechet Berachot
25 minutes before Korbanot
*****
Times for this week
Shacharit
Sunday
Korbanot 7:50 am Hodu 8.00 am
Mincha & Arbit 3:30 pm

Monday, Thursday & Friday
 6.55
Hodu: 7.05    Barechu: 7.15

Tues, Wed, Fri 
7.00
Hodu: 7.10   Barechu: 7.20

Arbit 
Monday – Thursday
7:00 pm
Please support our minyanim whenever possible!
Updates will appear on the WhatsApp group image.png
If anyone needs any help getting to or from the minyanim 
please contact one of the members of the Mahamad
*****
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  Avot Ubanim
Winter Season
in the comfort of your own home,
for more information about 
the ZOOM link
please contact
07815 885 245

Dvar Torah
Gaby Weinberg
Prizes
Gavriel Sacks
Yaakov Tangy
Zak Mellul

 ***************
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 Yitro – Who Should Be Learning?

HaGaon Rabbi Yaakov Hillel – Straight from the Heart‏

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Sefardic World
Ron Gomes Casseres gives a brief history of the Jewish community of the Caribbean island of Curaçao, the longest surviving Jewish community in the Americas. In the early days there were more Jews in Curaçao than in all of the rest of the Western Hemisphere. Ron will discuss the history of the Curaçao Jewish community, its heritage and traditions. He will show us sites of Jewish interest, as well as the community’s famous archives dating back to the Eighteenth Century. 

Ron Gomes Casseres descends from Sephardic Jews who first landed in Curaçao in 1690. He was born on the Dutch Caribbean island where he is a leader of the historic Mikvé Israel-Emanuel community. Now retired, one of his interests is the history of his Jewish community and its practices. He has been active in numerous organizations and institutions and was awarded decorations by the Kingdom of the Netherlands and the Government of Japan.

Many thanks to our regular and new patrons. We couldn't do this without you. If you haven't yet signed up, a small monthly donation helps us keep the show on the road! https://www.patreon.com/sephardi 

The meeting is Sunday 7 February 2021, at 11am LA, 2pm NYC, 7pm London, 8pm Amsterdam and 9pm Jerusalem. Join us on Zoom at: 

https://us02web.zoom.us/j/81451099216

If you cannot get into the meeting we have an overflow at: https://www.facebook.com/sephardicgenealogy

Best wishes,

Ton and David

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Dear Members, regular Mitpalelim & Friends of Moor Lane Synagogue,

In keeping with the Mahamad’s aim of continuously trying to improve the synagogue and the facilities for the betterment of the community, we have recently undertaken to explore the feasibility of expanding our facilities. We identified the need for a larger entrance lobby, better cloakroom and WC facilities, a larger Ezrat Nashim and a dedicated youth and Kollel room. To this end we commissioned plans and we have submitted a Planning Application for a scheme to deliver on these requirements. The council has not yet committed to supporting our application so we are advised that we need to make it clear to the council that the scheme is strongly supported by the Community. 

To this end, we would be very grateful indeed if everyone will please go online and register your strong support for the development project. The more people that leave comments the better. 

Please include in your comments how you feel this proposal will help the community in all its endeavors and how you agree that the design is suitable and sympathetic to its context. 

Many thanks indeed for your participation and we look forward to working with the community to deliver this exciting project in the near future. 

Lastly, if you have any queries then please be in touch with Yamin or any member of the Mahammad.
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לוח זמני תפלה לחורף תשפ״א

מוצאי שבת

ערבית
)מוצ“ש(

שקיעה

מנחה שבת

סוף זמן קריאת שמע

הדלקת נרות

מנחה וקבלת שבת

תאריך

שבת פרשת

Shabbat

Ends

Arbit

Sunset

Minha

Shema before

Candle Lighting

Minha & Kabbalat Shabbat

Date

Parasha

PM

PM

PM

PM

AM

PM

PM

 

 

5:54

5:50

5:00

4:25

10:04

4:44

4:44

5/6 Feb

יתרו

 (עשרת הדברות) (ש''מ)

  

Q & A on Parashat Yitro

All references are to the verses and Rashi’s commentary, unless otherwise stated.

  1. Yitro had 7 names. Why was one of his names Yeter ?
    18:1 – Because he caused a parsha to be added to the Torah. Yeter means addition.
  2. News of which two events motivated Yitro to come join the Jewish People?
    18:1 – The splitting of the sea and the war against Amalek.
  3. What name of Yitro indicates his love for Torah?
    18:1 – Chovav.
  4. Why was Tzipora with her father, Yitro, and not with Moshe when Bnei Yisrael left Egypt?
    18:3 – When Aharon met Moshe with his family on their way down to Egypt, Aharon said to Moshe: “We're pained over the Jews already in Egypt, and you're bringing more Jews to Egypt?” Moshe, hearing this, sent his wife and children back to Midian.
  5. Why does verse 18:5 say that Yitro came to the desert — don't we already know that the Bnei Yisrael were in the desert?
    18:5 – To show Yitro's greatness. He was living in a luxurious place; yet he went to the desert in order to study the Torah.
  6. Why did Moshe tell Yitro all that G-d had done for the Jewish People?
    18:8 – To draw Yitro closer to the Torah way of life.
  7. According to the Midrash quoted by Rashi, how did Yitro respond when he was told about the destruction of Egypt?
    18:9 – He grieved.
  8. Who is considered as if he enjoys the splendor of the Shechina ?
    18:12 – One who dines with Torah scholars.
  9. On what day did Moshe sit to judge the Jewish People?
    18:13 – The day after Yom Kippur.
  10. Who is considered a co-partner in Creation?
    18:13 – A judge who renders a correct decision.
  11. “Moshe sat to judge the people, and the people stood before Moshe….” What bothered Yitro about this arrangement?
    18:14 – Yitro felt that the people weren't being treated with the proper respect.
  12. Why did Yitro return to his own land?
    18:27 – To convert the members of his family to Judaism.
  13. How did the encampment at Sinai differ from the other encampments?
    19:2 – The Jewish People were united.
  14. To whom does the Torah refer when it uses the term “Beit Yaakov “?
    19:3 – The Jewish women.
  15. How is G-d's protection of the Jewish People similar to an eagle's protection of its young?
    19:4 – An eagle carries its young on top of its wings to protect them from human arrows. So too, G-d's cloud of glory separated between the Egyptians and the Jewish camp in order to absorb Egyptian missiles and arrows fired at the Jewish People.
  16. What was G-d's original plan for Matan Torah ? What was the response of the Jewish People?
    19:9 – G-d offered to appear to Moshe and to give the Torah through him. The Jewish People responded that they wished to hear the Torah directly from G-d.
  17. How many times greater is the “measure of reward” than the “measure of punishment”?
    20:6 – 500 times.
  18. How is it derived that “Don't steal” refers to kidnapping?
    20:13 – Since it is written immediately after “Don't murder” and “Don't commit adultery,” it is derived that “Don't steal” refers to a crime carrying the same penalty as the first two, namely, the death penalty.
  19. In response to hearing the Torah given at Sinai, how far backwards did the Jewish people retreat in fear?
    20:15 – They backed away from the mountain twelve mil (one mil is 2000 cubits).
  20. Why does the use of iron tools profane the altar?
    20:22 – The altar was created to extend life; iron is sometimes used to make weapons which shorten life.



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Halachot from Maran Rabbi Ovadia Yosef Ztz'l


הקדמה להלכות כבוד אב ואם – יחסו של מרן זצ”ל לאמו ע”ה

לפני כמה שנים, למדנו בהלכה יומית את עיקר דיני כיבוד אב ואם, ומכיון שרבים מבקשים להבהיר עוד כמה פרטי דינים בנדונים אלו, וחסרו הרבה פרטים בהלכות שפורסמו כבר, לכן בימים הקרובים נדבר מעניני כבוד אב ואם, בתוספת נופך מרובה ממה שנכתב כאן כבר בעבר.

גודל החיוב בכבוד ההורים 
שנינו בברייתא במסכת קידושין (דף ל:) תנו רבנן, נאמר: “כבד את אביך ואת אמך”,  ונאמר “כבד את ה' מהונך”, השוה הכתוב כבוד אב ואם לכבוד המקום (המקום, היינו הקדוש ברוך הוא.) נאמר “איש אמו ואביו תיראו” ונאמר “את ה' אלוקיך תירא”, השוה הכתוב מוראת אב ואם למוראת המקום.

כלומר, כל כך החמיר הקדוש ברוך בחיוב כבוד ההורים, עד שהשווה את כבודם ואת מוראם לכבודו ומוראו.

שלשה שותפים באדם 
תנו רבנן, שלשה שותפין באדם הקדוש ברוך הוא, ואביו ואמו. כלומר, שביצירת האדם שותפין האב והאם, והקדוש ברוך הוא נופח בו נשמה, מראה עין ושמיעת אוזן ודיבור, בזמן שאדם מכבד את אביו ואת אמו, אמר הקדוש ברוך הוא, מעלה אני עליכם כאילו דרתי ביניכם וכבדתם אותי.

עוד נאמר בתורה (ויקרא יט), “איש אמו ואביו תראו ואת שבתותי תשמורו”, ללמדך, שאם יאמר לך אביך לחלל שבת, לא תשמע בקולו, שאף אביך מחוייב בכבוד ה' יתברך שצוה על שמירת השבת. וכן בכל עניני המצות, שאם יאמרו לך הוריך לעבור על אחת מכל מצות התורה או מדברי חכמים, לא תשמע בקולם, שאף הם מחוייבים במצות הללו.

כבוד אביו וכבוד אמו 
תניא, רבי אומר, גלוי וידוע לפני מי שאמר והיה העולם שהבן מכבד את אמו יותר מאביו, לפיכך הקדים הקדוש ברוך הוא כבוד אב לכבוד אם (שנאמר, “כבד את אביך ואת אמך”). וגלוי וידוע לפני מי שאמר והיה העולם שהבן מתיירא מאביו יותר מאמו, לפיכך הקדים הקדוש ברוך הוא מורא אם למורא האב. (שנאמר “איש אמו ואביו תיראו“).
  
עד היכן כבוד אב ואם?
שאלו את רבי אליעזר, עד היכן כבוד אב ואם? אמר להם, צאו וראו מה עשה עובד כוכבים אחד באשקלון ודמא בן נתינה שמו, פעם אחת בקשו ממנו חכמים אבנים לאפוד של הכהן הגדול, והיה שוויו סכום עצום של שש מאות אלף דינרי זהב, והיה המפתח של אותו המקום שבו האבנים מונח תחת הכר שישן עליו אביו, וכדי לא לצער את אביו, לא הקיצו משנתו, והפסיד את ההון שהציעו לו חכמי ישראל. לשנה האחרת, נתן הקדוש ברוך הוא שכרו, שנולדה לו פרה אדומה בעדרו, ומכר אותה לחכמי ישראל בעד אותו סכום שהפסיד בשביל כבוד אביו.

ועוד סיפרו שם בגמרא על דמא בן נתינה, שפעם אחת היה לבוש בגדי זהב מאותם של נכבדי רומי, והיה יושב בין גדולי רומי, ובאה אמו וקרעה ממנו את אותו הבגד, וטפחה על ראשו וירקה בפניו, והוא לא הכלימה.

ועוד הביאו שם (דף לא:) מעשה ברבי טרפון, שבכל פעם שהייתה אמו יורדת ועולה למיטתה (שהייתה גבוהה מן הארץ) היה כורע כדי שתוכל אמו לרדת על גבו (דהיינו שהיה משמש לה כ”דרגש” לעלות ולרדת ממיטתה.) ועוד הובאו שם בגמרא כמה מעשים בגודל מצות כבוד אב ואם ועד היכן הדברים מגיעים. ומרן רבינו יוסף קארו, בשלחן ערוך (יו”ד סי' רמ) פתח את הלכות כבוד אב ואם “צריך ליזהר מאד בכבוד אביו ואמו ובמוראם”, כי מצוה זו היא יקרה מאד, ובנקל יכול אדם להיכשל בה, ועל כן החובה מוטלת על כל אדם להיזהר הרבה במצוה זו לקיימה כהלכתה.

חומר עון זלזול הורים גדול מאד, הרבה יותר ממה שנראה לבני אדם. ורבותינו המקובלים האריכו לתת תיקון לכל חוטא על חטאו, וכגון, מי שנשבע לשקר, שעוונו גדול מאד כנודע, ותקנתו שיתענה שלשים ושבעה תעניות לכפר על חטאו (ואין אנו נכנסים כאן לענין מעשה, כיצד יש לנהוג בזה בזמנינו שהדורות חלשים), ומי שביזה את אביו או אמו, כתב בספר חרדים, שתקנתו להתענות על חטאו ששים תעניות. ומכאן נלמד חומר העון של מי שאינו זהיר בכבוד אביו ואמו. ואשרי חלקו של הזהיר בזה, כי טובה מדה טובה ממדת פורענות.

וכאן המקום להזכיר מנהגת מרן זצ”ל, שהיה מכבד את אביו ואמו מאד מאד, ובאופן מיוחד נהג כבוד רב כלפי אמו, משום שחש הכרת הטוב עצומה כלפיה, שכן בילדותו, בזמן שהיה שוקד על תלמודו, היתה היא עובדת במקומו בחנות של אביו, ותמיד היתה מעודדת אותו לשקוד על דלתות התורה, ואף שהיה זה בימי דוחק ועוני, היתה שומרת אצלה ממתקים כגון שוקולד וסוכריות יקרות ערך, ומעניקה לו אותם לאחר שהיה שוקד על התורה, ועל ידי כך התעודד להמשיך בשקידת התורה, למרות שכל שכניו וחבריו בני גילו יצאו לעסקים ונהנו מהנאות העולם הזה.

וכאשר התמנה מרן זצ”ל כדיין בבית הדין בפתח תקוה, קנו לו לבוש מיוחד “פראק” של הדיינים. והקפיד מרן זצ”ל ללבוש את הפראק בפעם הראשונה בנוכחות אמו, כדי שתראה אותו בגדולתו ותשמח בלבה. וכן היה תמיד מקפיד לבקרה בביתה ולשמח אותה, ואף לאחר מותה, היה מזכירה לשבח בהקדמות ספריו, אשריה ואשרי חלקה. (וכתבנו בזה באריכות בספר אביר הרועים חלק ראשון)

Introduction to the Laws of Honoring One’s Parents

Several years ago, we have discussed the laws of honoring one’s parents on “Halacha Yomit”. Since we have received many requests to clarify some details regarding these laws in addition to the fact that many details were missing from the Halachot we have published already, we will therefore spend the next few days revisiting the laws of honoring one’s parents with many additions to what we have published in the past.

The Importance of the Obligation to Honor One’s Parents
The Baraita in Masechet Kiddushin (30b) tells us: “Our Sages taught: The Torah states, ‘Honor your father and your mother,’ and it also states, ‘Honor Hashem with your wealth.’ The Torah thus equates honoring one’s parents to honoring Hashem. The Torah states, ‘Each shall revere his mother and father,’ and it also states, ‘You shall fear Hashem, your G-d.’ The Torah thus equates revering one’s parents to fearing Hashem.”

This means that Hashem treated honoring one’s parents so stringently that He actually equated the honor and reverence showed to parents to His own honor and reverence.

The Three Partners in the Formation of Man
“The Sages taught: There are three partners in [the formation of] man: Hashem, the father, and the mother (which means that the parents are partners in the formation of the child’s body whereas Hashem provides the soul, eyesight, hearing, and the power of speech). When one honors one’s parents, Hashem says, ‘I consider it as though I have dwelled among you and you have honored Me.’”

The Torah further states (Vayikra 19), “Each man shall revere his mother and father and you shall keep My Shabbat,” to teach us that if one’s father commands him to desecrate the Shabbat, the child may not obey his father, for the father is likewise obligated to honor Hashem who has commanded to observe the holy Shabbat. The same applies to any other Mitzvot in that if one’s parents command him to transgress any of the Torah’s commandments or that of the Sages, one may not obey them, for they are also obligated to keep these commandments.

The Honor of One’s Father Versus the Honor of One’s Mother
The Baraita states: “Rabbi [Yehuda HaNassi] says: It is revealed and known before the One Who said and brought the world into existence that a son honors his mother more than his father. Thus, Hashem preceded the Mitzvah to honor one’s father before the Mitzvah to honor one’s mother. It is also revealed and known before the One Who said and brought the world into existence that a son fears his father more than his mother. Thus, Hashem preceded the Mitzvah to revere one’s mother before the Mitzvah to revere one’s father (as the verse states, “Each man shall revere his mother and father”).”

To What Extent Must One Honor His Parents?
Rabbi Eliezer was asked, “To what extent must one honor one’s parents?” He answered, “Take a look at what a certain non-Jew from Ashkelon by the name of Dama ben Netina did. Once, the Sages requested a certain stone for the apron (worn by the Kohen Gadol) from him for the sum of 600,000 golden Dinars. The key for the safe where the stones were placed lay under the pillow of his sleeping father. In order not to disturb his father, he did not awaken him. The next year, Hashem rewarded him by making a Red Heifer be born in his flock which he proceeded to sell to the Sages for the same amount that he lost for his father’s honor.”

The Gemara further recounts that once, Dama ben Netina was once adorned with the golden vestments usually worn by Rome’s highest officials and was sitting among some of the most respected citizens of Rome when his mother arrived, tore his clothing, whacked him on the head, and spit at him; yet, he did not humiliate her in return.

The Gemara (ibid. 31b) recounts another incident with Rabbi Tarfon that whenever his mother would need to get onto or off of her bed (which was slightly elevated from the ground), Rabbi Tarfon would kneel in order for her to step on his back (meaning that he would be like her “stool” to get on and off the bed). The Gemara there continues to bring similar incidents that illustrate the importance of honoring one’s parents and to what extent one must do so. Maran Rabbeinu Yosef Karo in his Shulchan Aruch (Yoreh De’ah, Chapter 240) introduces the laws of honoring one’s parents by saying, “One must be exceedingly careful regarding honoring and revering one’s parents,” for this is indeed a precious Mitzvah and one can easily fail in its performance. Thus, one must be extremely careful to fulfill this Mitzvah properly.

The severity of disrespecting one’s parents is indeed very grave; more serious that what it may seem to people. The Mekubalim describe lengthy atonement processes for various sins, such as if one swore falsely, which is understandably a great sin, one may atone for this by fasting thirty-seven fasts to atone for his transgression (we are not getting into what one should actually do in this generation that is weaker than previous ones). If one humiliates his father or mother, the Sefer Charedim writes that one must fast sixty fasts in order to atone for this sin. We can clearly see the gravity of the sin of one who is not careful with his parents’ respect. Praiseworthy is one who is careful with this Mitzvah, for the attribute of reward is far greater than the attribute of punishment.

Let us now discuss the custom of Maran zt”l who honored his parents tremendously. He especially honored his mother in a unique manner because he was grateful for the fact that when he toiled in Torah study in his youth, she would take his place working in his father’s store. She would likewise always encourage him to immerse himself in his Torah study. Although they were extremely poor, she would always save some expensive chocolates and other sweets and give them to him after he was done studying Torah. In this way, Maran was encouraged to continue in his quest of Torah knowledge while other children his age went on to work and enjoy the pleasures of this world.

When Maran zt”l was appointed as a judge in the rabbinical court in Petach Tikvah, he was presented with the special rabbinical coat called a “frock”. Maran zt”l made sure to wear this coat for the first time in the presence of his mother so that she should witness his rise to greatness and be proud of her son. Maran would always make sure to visit her at home and gladden her heart. Even after her passing, Maran would mention her admiringly in the introductions to his various works

 


דין כבוד ומורא אב ואם

מצות כיבוד הורים, נחלקת לשני חלקים. החלק הראשון, הם הדברים השייכים ל”כיבוד” הורים. והחלק השני, הם הדברים השייכים “למורא”, כלומר, ליראה מההורים. וכפי שנאמר בתורה, “כבד את אביך ואת אמך”, “איש אמו ואביו תראו“.

איזהו מורא מההורים? לא יעמוד במקום המיוחד לאביו להתפלל, ולא ישב במקום המיוחד לאביו להסב בביתו, (כגון בראש השולחן), ולא יסתור דברי אביו, לומר מה שאמרת אבא, אינו נכון. ולא מכריע דברי אביו, כגון לומר נראין דברי אבא. (ובהמשך יבוארו הדברים). 

יש אומרים, שאסור לאדם לשבת במקומו של אביו, אפילו כאשר אביו אינו נמצא בבית. ויש אומרים שאין להחמיר בדבר, אלא בפני אביו, שאז יש בכך מדת חוצפה וחוסר דרך ארץ, שיושב במקומו של אביו, אבל אם אביו אינו נמצא בבית, מותר לשבת במקומו.

ולהלכה כתב מרן רבינו עובדיה יוסף זצוק”ל, שמעיקר הדין מותר לשבת במקומו של אביו אם אביו אינו נוכח שם. אולם יש להוסיף על כך, שבמקומותינו, שישיבה במקום מיוחד לאביו, וכגון שיש לו כסא מיוחד, נחשבת לחוצפה כלפי האב, וזלזול בכבודו, הרי שאז לכל הדעות אין להקל בזה. משום שזלזול באב אסור בכל אופן.

עד היכן מוראם? כלומר, עד כמה הבן מחוייב לירא מהוריו? היה הבן לבוש בגדים יקרים, ויושב בראש הקהל, ובאו אביו ואמו וקרעו בגדיו והכוהו על ראשו וירקו בפניו, לא יכלים אותם, ויאמר להם מה עשיתם לי? וכדומה, אלא ישתוק ויירא ממלך מלכי המלכים שצוהו בכך. (ודין זה נלמד מן המעשה שנזכר בגמרא והוזכר בהלכה הקודמת עד היכן וכו', פעם אחת היה דמא בן נתינה לבוש בגד של זהב והיה יושב בין גדולי רומי ובאה אמו וקרעתו ממנו וטפחה לו על ראשו וירקה לו בפניו, ולא הכלימה.) 

איזהו כבוד הורים? מאכילם ומשקה אותם ומלביש ומכסה וכדומה, ויתן להם הכל בסבר פנים יפות, ואמרו רבותינו, שאפילו אם היה הבן מאכיל את אביו בכל יום אווזים מפוטמות, אבל היה מראה לו פנים זועפות, נענש עליו, כי היחס הטוב והארת הפנים להורים, היא חלק מרכזי ויסודי במצות כיבוד אב ואם.

ועד היכן הוא כבוד אב ואם? אפילו נטלו כיס (ארנק) של זהובים של הבן, והשליכו בפניו לים, לא יכלימם ולא יצער בפניהם ולא יכעוס כנגדם, אלא יקבל גזירת הכתוב וישתוק. ויש אומרים שמכל מקום אם יכול למנוע בעדם להשליך הארנק לים, רשאי לעשות כן, ועל כל פנים יכול אחר כך לתבוע את אביו ואמו לדין, משום שאדם אינו מחויב להפסיד ממון מפני מצות כבוד אב ואם.

ולהלן נבאר בעזרת ה' את החילוקים שיש בין עניני כבוד אב ואם, לעניני מורא אב ואם

The Laws of Honoring and Revering One’s Parents

As was mentioned in the previous Halacha, the Mitzvah of honoring one’s parents includes two different aspects: honoring one’s parents and revering one’s parents. Indeed, the Torah states, “Honor your father and mother” and “Each man shall fear his mother and father.”

What does revering entail? One should not stand in one’s father’s designated place for prayer or sit in his designated seat at home (for instance, at the head of the table). Additionally, one should not contradict one’s father’s words by saying, “Father, what you have said is incorrect” or approve of his words by saying, “My father’s words seem correct.” (This shall be explained further.)

Some say that one may not sit in one’s father’s designated seat even when the father is not home. Others say that this is only a problem when this is done in the father’s presence, for only then is it a display of audacity and a lack of respect by the child sitting in his father’s place. However, if the father is not home, one may sit in his place.

Halachically speaking, Maran Rabbeinu Ovadia Yosef zt”l writes that according to the letter of the law, a child may indeed sit in his father’s designated place if the father is not present. Nevertheless, we must add that in places such like ours where sitting in one’s father’s designated seat is considered disrespectful toward one’s father and his honor, for instance, due to the fact that he has a special chair and the like, according to all opinions one may not be lenient in this matter, for disrespect to one’s father is prohibited in any situation.

To what extent must one revere one’s parents? Even if one was wearing expensive clothing and sitting among important and influential people and his parents arrived, tore his clothing, hit him on the head, and spit at him, one may not humiliate them by exclaiming, “What have you done to me?,” and the like; rather, one must remain silent and fear Hashem, King of all kings, who has commanded one to do so. (This law is derived from the incident recorded by the Gemara, which we have mentioned in the previous Halacha, about how once,  Dama ben Netina was bedecked with golden garments and was sitting among honorary Roman noblemen; his mother came, tore his clothing, whacked him on the head, spit in his face, and yet, he did not humiliate her).

What does honoring entail? One must feed his parents, give them to drink, dress them, cover them, and the like. All this should be done with a smiling and radiant countenance, for even if one were to feed one’s parents stuffed ducklings every day while bearing a scowling expression, one will be punished for this. Indeed, cheer and a radiant countenance is an integral part of the Mitzvah of honoring one’s parents

To what extent must one honor one’s parents? Even if a parent takes a wallet full of gold coins belonging to the child and throws it into the sea in front of the child, the child should not humiliate them, distress them, or become angry at them; rather, he should accept this Heavenly decree and remain silent. Some say that if the child has the ability to prevent the parent from throwing the wallet into the sea, he may in fact exercise it. In any event, he may summon the parent to a Bet Din after the fact, for one is not obligated to lose money due to the Mitzvah of honoring one’s parents.

In coming Halachot we shall, G-d willing, explain the differences between honoring and revering one’s parents

 

 

Newsletter Parashat Yitro – Aseret Hadiberot – Shabbat Mevarechim

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Have a look at our website www.moorlane.info  
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THIS week is Shabbat Yitro
where we read the 
עשרת הדיברות
10 Commandments
&
It is also
Shabbat Mevarechim
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NEXT WEEK
3 SEFARIM
Shabbat Mishpatim
Shabbat Rosh Chodesh
Parashat Shekalim
Haftara of 
1) Shekalim 
2) 1st & last Pasuk of Rosh Chodesh
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Minhagim

‘Aseret HaDiberot – The Ten Commandments

It is the minhag of all Jews from North Africa, as well as our brothers, the Ashkenazim, to stand up during the reading of the ‘Aseret HaDiberot (the Ten Commandments) on Shabu’ot, Shabat Yitro, and Shabat VaEthanan, to commemorate the time when Yisrael stood at Har Sinai as if we are once again welcoming the face of the Shekhina (Divine Presence) and accepting the Tora.[1]

However, Rambam[2] writes not to stand for the ‘aseret hadiberot because the heretics will claim, “we only attribute importance to these ten misvot as they are the only ones that are true; the rest of the Tora is not true,” has veshalom. The reason we continue to follow this minhag, is because the heretics at the time of Rambam were much different then the heretics of today as heretics of today do not make such claims.[3] Ribi Shalom Messas[4] is also of this opinion and explains further that whether we were to remain seated or we stood during the ‘aseret hadiberot it would not change the perception of the heretics; either way they would find ways to deny the Tora. Also, it is clear that since we continue to read the remainder of the parasha – and not solely the ‘aseret hadiberot – there is no reason to worry about such claims.[5] Ribi Yehuda ‘Ayash of Algeria is also of this opinion and writes that the claims of the heretics could only persuade an ignoramus of nowadays using such logic.[6] Furthermore, Maran HaHida[7] explains that since we make berakhot before and after each ‘aliya latora – and not just the ‘aliya of the ‘aseret hadiberot – we have no worry that heretics will make a claim that the rest of the Tora is untrue.

Maran HaHida[8] cautions us, however, to stand from the beginning of the ‘aliya in order to show that we stand for other pesuqim as well. He also adds that it is very important that if the majority of the congregation is standing, one is NOT allowed to sit, as this illustrates a belittlement of the ‘Aseret HaDiberot, G-d forbid. Nonetheless, the majority of Moroccan posqim write that the common minhag is to stand only upon reaching the ‘Aseret HaDiberot for we are not concerned about the claims of the heretics at all.[9]

It was the tradition to gather women together and read them these Ten Commandments, in Arabic “ ‘Asr Klmat,” along with its explanation according to Hazal.[10]

Certain parts of the parasha are read in a special tune, among them the ‘Aseret HaDiberot and the Shirat HaYam in order to ascribe special importance to these sections of the Tora as they speak about the high spiritual level of Bené Yisrael and not, has veshalom, to say that they are more important than the rest of the Tora.[11]

 

 The minhag of Spanish Portuguese synagogues & communities is to STAND during the reading of the Aseret Hadiberot

[1] As the Tora says “they were standing at a distance.” This minhag is cited by Dibré Shalom VeEmet (Heleq 2, p.72). Sefer Mamlekhet Kohanim records that this was also the minhag in Djerba and mainland Tunisia, Noheg BeHokhma p.143, QS”A Toledano (Siman 442:9), Yehavé Da’at Hazan (Heleq 3, O”H, Siman 13), Maté Yehuda ‘Ayash (Siman 1:6), Dabar Shemuel by Ribi Shemuel Abuhab (Siman 276), Kapé Aharon (Siman 39), and Sedé Hemed (Kelalé HaPosqim, Siman 5:14). In Shemesh Umaghen (Heleq 1, O”H, Siman 57, p.130) Ribi Shalom Messas solidifies our custom to stand based on the fact that today we do not have the same type of heretics that they had in the times of Hazal and because of whom this minhag was spoken out fiercely against. Maran HaHida (LeDavid Emet Siman 7:5) further says that one should stand in order to stir feelings of fear and trepidation as were felt at Har Sinai.


Those who speak out against this practice do so because to a foreigner it might seem as if the ‘Aseret HaDiberot are more important than the rest of the Tora. This gives reason for the heretics to believe that only the ‘Aseret HaDiberot were given at Har Sinai and not the rest of the Tora which is not the truth, has veshalom.
 

[2] In his handwritten responsa that was compiled along with approximately 367 other responses in 1934. (Siman 46).

[3] Ribi Moshé Feinstein’s response, Igerot Moshé (Heleq 4, O”H Siman 22).

[4] Shemesh Umaghen (Heleq 1, O”H Siman 57 p.130-1) and (Heleq 3, O”H Siman 55:3).

[5] Maghen Abot (Siman 1, p.53-4): Diné Hashqamat HaBoqer.

[6] Maté Yehuda (Siman 1:6).

[7] LeDavid Emet (Siman 7:5).

[8] Toub ‘Ayin (Siman 11).

[9] Ribi Yehuda ‘Ayash of Algeria (Maté Yehuda Siman 1:6), Ribi Yishaq Hazan (Yehavé Da’at, Heleq 3, Siman 13), Ribi Yosef Messas in Osar HaMikhtabim (Heleq 3, §1859), and HaMalakh Refael Berdugo as quoted by the QS”A of Ribi Refael Barukh Toledano (p.174), all say that the common minhag is to stand only once we reach the ‘Aseret HaDiberot. This is also the minhag of Tunisia (Mamlekhet Kohanim) and Libya (Netibot HaMa’arab, Shabu’ot §12).

[10] This is to make the Tora more pleasant to them, and with this they should be more helpful to their husbands in facilitating their Tora learning. See Nahagu Ha’Am (Shabu’ot §5, p.57) as the source and for the lyrics in Arabic.

[11] See Noheg BeHokhma (p.145 §13).

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with 
Rabbi Oppenheimer
learning 
Masechet Berachot
25 minutes before Korbanot
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Times for this week
Shacharit
Sunday
Korbanot 7:50 am Hodu 8.00 am
Mincha & Arbit 3:30 pm

Monday, Thursday & Friday
 6.55
Hodu: 7.05    Barechu: 7.15

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  Avot Ubanim
Winter Season
in the comfort of your own home,
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Dvar Torah
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 Yitro – Who Should Be Learning?

HaGaon Rabbi Yaakov Hillel – Straight from the Heart‏

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Sefardic World
Ron Gomes Casseres gives a brief history of the Jewish community of the Caribbean island of Curaçao, the longest surviving Jewish community in the Americas. In the early days there were more Jews in Curaçao than in all of the rest of the Western Hemisphere. Ron will discuss the history of the Curaçao Jewish community, its heritage and traditions. He will show us sites of Jewish interest, as well as the community’s famous archives dating back to the Eighteenth Century. 

Ron Gomes Casseres descends from Sephardic Jews who first landed in Curaçao in 1690. He was born on the Dutch Caribbean island where he is a leader of the historic Mikvé Israel-Emanuel community. Now retired, one of his interests is the history of his Jewish community and its practices. He has been active in numerous organizations and institutions and was awarded decorations by the Kingdom of the Netherlands and the Government of Japan.

Many thanks to our regular and new patrons. We couldn't do this without you. If you haven't yet signed up, a small monthly donation helps us keep the show on the road! https://www.patreon.com/sephardi 

The meeting is Sunday 7 February 2021, at 11am LA, 2pm NYC, 7pm London, 8pm Amsterdam and 9pm Jerusalem. Join us on Zoom at: 

https://us02web.zoom.us/j/81451099216

If you cannot get into the meeting we have an overflow at: https://www.facebook.com/sephardicgenealogy

Best wishes,

Ton and David

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Dear Members, regular Mitpalelim & Friends of Moor Lane Synagogue,

In keeping with the Mahamad’s aim of continuously trying to improve the synagogue and the facilities for the betterment of the community, we have recently undertaken to explore the feasibility of expanding our facilities. We identified the need for a larger entrance lobby, better cloakroom and WC facilities, a larger Ezrat Nashim and a dedicated youth and Kollel room. To this end we commissioned plans and we have submitted a Planning Application for a scheme to deliver on these requirements. The council has not yet committed to supporting our application so we are advised that we need to make it clear to the council that the scheme is strongly supported by the Community. 

To this end, we would be very grateful indeed if everyone will please go online and register your strong support for the development project. The more people that leave comments the better. 

Please include in your comments how you feel this proposal will help the community in all its endeavors and how you agree that the design is suitable and sympathetic to its context. 

Many thanks indeed for your participation and we look forward to working with the community to deliver this exciting project in the near future. 

Lastly, if you have any queries then please be in touch with Yamin or any member of the Mahammad.
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לוח זמני תפלה לחורף תשפ״א

מוצאי שבת

ערבית
)מוצ“ש(

שקיעה

מנחה שבת

סוף זמן קריאת שמע

הדלקת נרות

מנחה וקבלת שבת

תאריך

שבת פרשת

Shabbat

Ends

Arbit

Sunset

Minha

Shema before

Candle Lighting

Minha & Kabbalat Shabbat

Date

Parasha

PM

PM

PM

PM

AM

PM

PM

 

 

5:54

5:50

5:00

4:25

10:04

4:44

4:44

5/6 Feb

יתרו

 (עשרת הדברות) (ש''מ)

  

Q & A on Parashat Yitro

All references are to the verses and Rashi’s commentary, unless otherwise stated.

  1. Yitro had 7 names. Why was one of his names Yeter ?
    18:1 – Because he caused a parsha to be added to the Torah. Yeter means addition.
  2. News of which two events motivated Yitro to come join the Jewish People?
    18:1 – The splitting of the sea and the war against Amalek.
  3. What name of Yitro indicates his love for Torah?
    18:1 – Chovav.
  4. Why was Tzipora with her father, Yitro, and not with Moshe when Bnei Yisrael left Egypt?
    18:3 – When Aharon met Moshe with his family on their way down to Egypt, Aharon said to Moshe: “We're pained over the Jews already in Egypt, and you're bringing more Jews to Egypt?” Moshe, hearing this, sent his wife and children back to Midian.
  5. Why does verse 18:5 say that Yitro came to the desert — don't we already know that the Bnei Yisrael were in the desert?
    18:5 – To show Yitro's greatness. He was living in a luxurious place; yet he went to the desert in order to study the Torah.
  6. Why did Moshe tell Yitro all that G-d had done for the Jewish People?
    18:8 – To draw Yitro closer to the Torah way of life.
  7. According to the Midrash quoted by Rashi, how did Yitro respond when he was told about the destruction of Egypt?
    18:9 – He grieved.
  8. Who is considered as if he enjoys the splendor of the Shechina ?
    18:12 – One who dines with Torah scholars.
  9. On what day did Moshe sit to judge the Jewish People?
    18:13 – The day after Yom Kippur.
  10. Who is considered a co-partner in Creation?
    18:13 – A judge who renders a correct decision.
  11. “Moshe sat to judge the people, and the people stood before Moshe….” What bothered Yitro about this arrangement?
    18:14 – Yitro felt that the people weren't being treated with the proper respect.
  12. Why did Yitro return to his own land?
    18:27 – To convert the members of his family to Judaism.
  13. How did the encampment at Sinai differ from the other encampments?
    19:2 – The Jewish People were united.
  14. To whom does the Torah refer when it uses the term “Beit Yaakov “?
    19:3 – The Jewish women.
  15. How is G-d's protection of the Jewish People similar to an eagle's protection of its young?
    19:4 – An eagle carries its young on top of its wings to protect them from human arrows. So too, G-d's cloud of glory separated between the Egyptians and the Jewish camp in order to absorb Egyptian missiles and arrows fired at the Jewish People.
  16. What was G-d's original plan for Matan Torah ? What was the response of the Jewish People?
    19:9 – G-d offered to appear to Moshe and to give the Torah through him. The Jewish People responded that they wished to hear the Torah directly from G-d.
  17. How many times greater is the “measure of reward” than the “measure of punishment”?
    20:6 – 500 times.
  18. How is it derived that “Don't steal” refers to kidnapping?
    20:13 – Since it is written immediately after “Don't murder” and “Don't commit adultery,” it is derived that “Don't steal” refers to a crime carrying the same penalty as the first two, namely, the death penalty.
  19. In response to hearing the Torah given at Sinai, how far backwards did the Jewish people retreat in fear?
    20:15 – They backed away from the mountain twelve mil (one mil is 2000 cubits).
  20. Why does the use of iron tools profane the altar?
    20:22 – The altar was created to extend life; iron is sometimes used to make weapons which shorten life.



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Halachot from Maran Rabbi Ovadia Yosef Ztz'l


הקדמה להלכות כבוד אב ואם – יחסו של מרן זצ”ל לאמו ע”ה

לפני כמה שנים, למדנו בהלכה יומית את עיקר דיני כיבוד אב ואם, ומכיון שרבים מבקשים להבהיר עוד כמה פרטי דינים בנדונים אלו, וחסרו הרבה פרטים בהלכות שפורסמו כבר, לכן בימים הקרובים נדבר מעניני כבוד אב ואם, בתוספת נופך מרובה ממה שנכתב כאן כבר בעבר.

גודל החיוב בכבוד ההורים 
שנינו בברייתא במסכת קידושין (דף ל:) תנו רבנן, נאמר: “כבד את אביך ואת אמך”,  ונאמר “כבד את ה' מהונך”, השוה הכתוב כבוד אב ואם לכבוד המקום (המקום, היינו הקדוש ברוך הוא.) נאמר “איש אמו ואביו תיראו” ונאמר “את ה' אלוקיך תירא”, השוה הכתוב מוראת אב ואם למוראת המקום.

כלומר, כל כך החמיר הקדוש ברוך בחיוב כבוד ההורים, עד שהשווה את כבודם ואת מוראם לכבודו ומוראו.

שלשה שותפים באדם 
תנו רבנן, שלשה שותפין באדם הקדוש ברוך הוא, ואביו ואמו. כלומר, שביצירת האדם שותפין האב והאם, והקדוש ברוך הוא נופח בו נשמה, מראה עין ושמיעת אוזן ודיבור, בזמן שאדם מכבד את אביו ואת אמו, אמר הקדוש ברוך הוא, מעלה אני עליכם כאילו דרתי ביניכם וכבדתם אותי.

עוד נאמר בתורה (ויקרא יט), “איש אמו ואביו תראו ואת שבתותי תשמורו”, ללמדך, שאם יאמר לך אביך לחלל שבת, לא תשמע בקולו, שאף אביך מחוייב בכבוד ה' יתברך שצוה על שמירת השבת. וכן בכל עניני המצות, שאם יאמרו לך הוריך לעבור על אחת מכל מצות התורה או מדברי חכמים, לא תשמע בקולם, שאף הם מחוייבים במצות הללו.

כבוד אביו וכבוד אמו 
תניא, רבי אומר, גלוי וידוע לפני מי שאמר והיה העולם שהבן מכבד את אמו יותר מאביו, לפיכך הקדים הקדוש ברוך הוא כבוד אב לכבוד אם (שנאמר, “כבד את אביך ואת אמך”). וגלוי וידוע לפני מי שאמר והיה העולם שהבן מתיירא מאביו יותר מאמו, לפיכך הקדים הקדוש ברוך הוא מורא אם למורא האב. (שנאמר “איש אמו ואביו תיראו“).
  
עד היכן כבוד אב ואם?
שאלו את רבי אליעזר, עד היכן כבוד אב ואם? אמר להם, צאו וראו מה עשה עובד כוכבים אחד באשקלון ודמא בן נתינה שמו, פעם אחת בקשו ממנו חכמים אבנים לאפוד של הכהן הגדול, והיה שוויו סכום עצום של שש מאות אלף דינרי זהב, והיה המפתח של אותו המקום שבו האבנים מונח תחת הכר שישן עליו אביו, וכדי לא לצער את אביו, לא הקיצו משנתו, והפסיד את ההון שהציעו לו חכמי ישראל. לשנה האחרת, נתן הקדוש ברוך הוא שכרו, שנולדה לו פרה אדומה בעדרו, ומכר אותה לחכמי ישראל בעד אותו סכום שהפסיד בשביל כבוד אביו.

ועוד סיפרו שם בגמרא על דמא בן נתינה, שפעם אחת היה לבוש בגדי זהב מאותם של נכבדי רומי, והיה יושב בין גדולי רומי, ובאה אמו וקרעה ממנו את אותו הבגד, וטפחה על ראשו וירקה בפניו, והוא לא הכלימה.

ועוד הביאו שם (דף לא:) מעשה ברבי טרפון, שבכל פעם שהייתה אמו יורדת ועולה למיטתה (שהייתה גבוהה מן הארץ) היה כורע כדי שתוכל אמו לרדת על גבו (דהיינו שהיה משמש לה כ”דרגש” לעלות ולרדת ממיטתה.) ועוד הובאו שם בגמרא כמה מעשים בגודל מצות כבוד אב ואם ועד היכן הדברים מגיעים. ומרן רבינו יוסף קארו, בשלחן ערוך (יו”ד סי' רמ) פתח את הלכות כבוד אב ואם “צריך ליזהר מאד בכבוד אביו ואמו ובמוראם”, כי מצוה זו היא יקרה מאד, ובנקל יכול אדם להיכשל בה, ועל כן החובה מוטלת על כל אדם להיזהר הרבה במצוה זו לקיימה כהלכתה.

חומר עון זלזול הורים גדול מאד, הרבה יותר ממה שנראה לבני אדם. ורבותינו המקובלים האריכו לתת תיקון לכל חוטא על חטאו, וכגון, מי שנשבע לשקר, שעוונו גדול מאד כנודע, ותקנתו שיתענה שלשים ושבעה תעניות לכפר על חטאו (ואין אנו נכנסים כאן לענין מעשה, כיצד יש לנהוג בזה בזמנינו שהדורות חלשים), ומי שביזה את אביו או אמו, כתב בספר חרדים, שתקנתו להתענות על חטאו ששים תעניות. ומכאן נלמד חומר העון של מי שאינו זהיר בכבוד אביו ואמו. ואשרי חלקו של הזהיר בזה, כי טובה מדה טובה ממדת פורענות.

וכאן המקום להזכיר מנהגת מרן זצ”ל, שהיה מכבד את אביו ואמו מאד מאד, ובאופן מיוחד נהג כבוד רב כלפי אמו, משום שחש הכרת הטוב עצומה כלפיה, שכן בילדותו, בזמן שהיה שוקד על תלמודו, היתה היא עובדת במקומו בחנות של אביו, ותמיד היתה מעודדת אותו לשקוד על דלתות התורה, ואף שהיה זה בימי דוחק ועוני, היתה שומרת אצלה ממתקים כגון שוקולד וסוכריות יקרות ערך, ומעניקה לו אותם לאחר שהיה שוקד על התורה, ועל ידי כך התעודד להמשיך בשקידת התורה, למרות שכל שכניו וחבריו בני גילו יצאו לעסקים ונהנו מהנאות העולם הזה.

וכאשר התמנה מרן זצ”ל כדיין בבית הדין בפתח תקוה, קנו לו לבוש מיוחד “פראק” של הדיינים. והקפיד מרן זצ”ל ללבוש את הפראק בפעם הראשונה בנוכחות אמו, כדי שתראה אותו בגדולתו ותשמח בלבה. וכן היה תמיד מקפיד לבקרה בביתה ולשמח אותה, ואף לאחר מותה, היה מזכירה לשבח בהקדמות ספריו, אשריה ואשרי חלקה. (וכתבנו בזה באריכות בספר אביר הרועים חלק ראשון)

Introduction to the Laws of Honoring One’s Parents

Several years ago, we have discussed the laws of honoring one’s parents on “Halacha Yomit”. Since we have received many requests to clarify some details regarding these laws in addition to the fact that many details were missing from the Halachot we have published already, we will therefore spend the next few days revisiting the laws of honoring one’s parents with many additions to what we have published in the past.

The Importance of the Obligation to Honor One’s Parents
The Baraita in Masechet Kiddushin (30b) tells us: “Our Sages taught: The Torah states, ‘Honor your father and your mother,’ and it also states, ‘Honor Hashem with your wealth.’ The Torah thus equates honoring one’s parents to honoring Hashem. The Torah states, ‘Each shall revere his mother and father,’ and it also states, ‘You shall fear Hashem, your G-d.’ The Torah thus equates revering one’s parents to fearing Hashem.”

This means that Hashem treated honoring one’s parents so stringently that He actually equated the honor and reverence showed to parents to His own honor and reverence.

The Three Partners in the Formation of Man
“The Sages taught: There are three partners in [the formation of] man: Hashem, the father, and the mother (which means that the parents are partners in the formation of the child’s body whereas Hashem provides the soul, eyesight, hearing, and the power of speech). When one honors one’s parents, Hashem says, ‘I consider it as though I have dwelled among you and you have honored Me.’”

The Torah further states (Vayikra 19), “Each man shall revere his mother and father and you shall keep My Shabbat,” to teach us that if one’s father commands him to desecrate the Shabbat, the child may not obey his father, for the father is likewise obligated to honor Hashem who has commanded to observe the holy Shabbat. The same applies to any other Mitzvot in that if one’s parents command him to transgress any of the Torah’s commandments or that of the Sages, one may not obey them, for they are also obligated to keep these commandments.

The Honor of One’s Father Versus the Honor of One’s Mother
The Baraita states: “Rabbi [Yehuda HaNassi] says: It is revealed and known before the One Who said and brought the world into existence that a son honors his mother more than his father. Thus, Hashem preceded the Mitzvah to honor one’s father before the Mitzvah to honor one’s mother. It is also revealed and known before the One Who said and brought the world into existence that a son fears his father more than his mother. Thus, Hashem preceded the Mitzvah to revere one’s mother before the Mitzvah to revere one’s father (as the verse states, “Each man shall revere his mother and father”).”

To What Extent Must One Honor His Parents?
Rabbi Eliezer was asked, “To what extent must one honor one’s parents?” He answered, “Take a look at what a certain non-Jew from Ashkelon by the name of Dama ben Netina did. Once, the Sages requested a certain stone for the apron (worn by the Kohen Gadol) from him for the sum of 600,000 golden Dinars. The key for the safe where the stones were placed lay under the pillow of his sleeping father. In order not to disturb his father, he did not awaken him. The next year, Hashem rewarded him by making a Red Heifer be born in his flock which he proceeded to sell to the Sages for the same amount that he lost for his father’s honor.”

The Gemara further recounts that once, Dama ben Netina was once adorned with the golden vestments usually worn by Rome’s highest officials and was sitting among some of the most respected citizens of Rome when his mother arrived, tore his clothing, whacked him on the head, and spit at him; yet, he did not humiliate her in return.

The Gemara (ibid. 31b) recounts another incident with Rabbi Tarfon that whenever his mother would need to get onto or off of her bed (which was slightly elevated from the ground), Rabbi Tarfon would kneel in order for her to step on his back (meaning that he would be like her “stool” to get on and off the bed). The Gemara there continues to bring similar incidents that illustrate the importance of honoring one’s parents and to what extent one must do so. Maran Rabbeinu Yosef Karo in his Shulchan Aruch (Yoreh De’ah, Chapter 240) introduces the laws of honoring one’s parents by saying, “One must be exceedingly careful regarding honoring and revering one’s parents,” for this is indeed a precious Mitzvah and one can easily fail in its performance. Thus, one must be extremely careful to fulfill this Mitzvah properly.

The severity of disrespecting one’s parents is indeed very grave; more serious that what it may seem to people. The Mekubalim describe lengthy atonement processes for various sins, such as if one swore falsely, which is understandably a great sin, one may atone for this by fasting thirty-seven fasts to atone for his transgression (we are not getting into what one should actually do in this generation that is weaker than previous ones). If one humiliates his father or mother, the Sefer Charedim writes that one must fast sixty fasts in order to atone for this sin. We can clearly see the gravity of the sin of one who is not careful with his parents’ respect. Praiseworthy is one who is careful with this Mitzvah, for the attribute of reward is far greater than the attribute of punishment.

Let us now discuss the custom of Maran zt”l who honored his parents tremendously. He especially honored his mother in a unique manner because he was grateful for the fact that when he toiled in Torah study in his youth, she would take his place working in his father’s store. She would likewise always encourage him to immerse himself in his Torah study. Although they were extremely poor, she would always save some expensive chocolates and other sweets and give them to him after he was done studying Torah. In this way, Maran was encouraged to continue in his quest of Torah knowledge while other children his age went on to work and enjoy the pleasures of this world.

When Maran zt”l was appointed as a judge in the rabbinical court in Petach Tikvah, he was presented with the special rabbinical coat called a “frock”. Maran zt”l made sure to wear this coat for the first time in the presence of his mother so that she should witness his rise to greatness and be proud of her son. Maran would always make sure to visit her at home and gladden her heart. Even after her passing, Maran would mention her admiringly in the introductions to his various works

 


דין כבוד ומורא אב ואם

מצות כיבוד הורים, נחלקת לשני חלקים. החלק הראשון, הם הדברים השייכים ל”כיבוד” הורים. והחלק השני, הם הדברים השייכים “למורא”, כלומר, ליראה מההורים. וכפי שנאמר בתורה, “כבד את אביך ואת אמך”, “איש אמו ואביו תראו“.

איזהו מורא מההורים? לא יעמוד במקום המיוחד לאביו להתפלל, ולא ישב במקום המיוחד לאביו להסב בביתו, (כגון בראש השולחן), ולא יסתור דברי אביו, לומר מה שאמרת אבא, אינו נכון. ולא מכריע דברי אביו, כגון לומר נראין דברי אבא. (ובהמשך יבוארו הדברים). 

יש אומרים, שאסור לאדם לשבת במקומו של אביו, אפילו כאשר אביו אינו נמצא בבית. ויש אומרים שאין להחמיר בדבר, אלא בפני אביו, שאז יש בכך מדת חוצפה וחוסר דרך ארץ, שיושב במקומו של אביו, אבל אם אביו אינו נמצא בבית, מותר לשבת במקומו.

ולהלכה כתב מרן רבינו עובדיה יוסף זצוק”ל, שמעיקר הדין מותר לשבת במקומו של אביו אם אביו אינו נוכח שם. אולם יש להוסיף על כך, שבמקומותינו, שישיבה במקום מיוחד לאביו, וכגון שיש לו כסא מיוחד, נחשבת לחוצפה כלפי האב, וזלזול בכבודו, הרי שאז לכל הדעות אין להקל בזה. משום שזלזול באב אסור בכל אופן.

עד היכן מוראם? כלומר, עד כמה הבן מחוייב לירא מהוריו? היה הבן לבוש בגדים יקרים, ויושב בראש הקהל, ובאו אביו ואמו וקרעו בגדיו והכוהו על ראשו וירקו בפניו, לא יכלים אותם, ויאמר להם מה עשיתם לי? וכדומה, אלא ישתוק ויירא ממלך מלכי המלכים שצוהו בכך. (ודין זה נלמד מן המעשה שנזכר בגמרא והוזכר בהלכה הקודמת עד היכן וכו', פעם אחת היה דמא בן נתינה לבוש בגד של זהב והיה יושב בין גדולי רומי ובאה אמו וקרעתו ממנו וטפחה לו על ראשו וירקה לו בפניו, ולא הכלימה.) 

איזהו כבוד הורים? מאכילם ומשקה אותם ומלביש ומכסה וכדומה, ויתן להם הכל בסבר פנים יפות, ואמרו רבותינו, שאפילו אם היה הבן מאכיל את אביו בכל יום אווזים מפוטמות, אבל היה מראה לו פנים זועפות, נענש עליו, כי היחס הטוב והארת הפנים להורים, היא חלק מרכזי ויסודי במצות כיבוד אב ואם.

ועד היכן הוא כבוד אב ואם? אפילו נטלו כיס (ארנק) של זהובים של הבן, והשליכו בפניו לים, לא יכלימם ולא יצער בפניהם ולא יכעוס כנגדם, אלא יקבל גזירת הכתוב וישתוק. ויש אומרים שמכל מקום אם יכול למנוע בעדם להשליך הארנק לים, רשאי לעשות כן, ועל כל פנים יכול אחר כך לתבוע את אביו ואמו לדין, משום שאדם אינו מחויב להפסיד ממון מפני מצות כבוד אב ואם.

ולהלן נבאר בעזרת ה' את החילוקים שיש בין עניני כבוד אב ואם, לעניני מורא אב ואם

The Laws of Honoring and Revering One’s Parents

As was mentioned in the previous Halacha, the Mitzvah of honoring one’s parents includes two different aspects: honoring one’s parents and revering one’s parents. Indeed, the Torah states, “Honor your father and mother” and “Each man shall fear his mother and father.”

What does revering entail? One should not stand in one’s father’s designated place for prayer or sit in his designated seat at home (for instance, at the head of the table). Additionally, one should not contradict one’s father’s words by saying, “Father, what you have said is incorrect” or approve of his words by saying, “My father’s words seem correct.” (This shall be explained further.)

Some say that one may not sit in one’s father’s designated seat even when the father is not home. Others say that this is only a problem when this is done in the father’s presence, for only then is it a display of audacity and a lack of respect by the child sitting in his father’s place. However, if the father is not home, one may sit in his place.

Halachically speaking, Maran Rabbeinu Ovadia Yosef zt”l writes that according to the letter of the law, a child may indeed sit in his father’s designated place if the father is not present. Nevertheless, we must add that in places such like ours where sitting in one’s father’s designated seat is considered disrespectful toward one’s father and his honor, for instance, due to the fact that he has a special chair and the like, according to all opinions one may not be lenient in this matter, for disrespect to one’s father is prohibited in any situation.

To what extent must one revere one’s parents? Even if one was wearing expensive clothing and sitting among important and influential people and his parents arrived, tore his clothing, hit him on the head, and spit at him, one may not humiliate them by exclaiming, “What have you done to me?,” and the like; rather, one must remain silent and fear Hashem, King of all kings, who has commanded one to do so. (This law is derived from the incident recorded by the Gemara, which we have mentioned in the previous Halacha, about how once,  Dama ben Netina was bedecked with golden garments and was sitting among honorary Roman noblemen; his mother came, tore his clothing, whacked him on the head, spit in his face, and yet, he did not humiliate her).

What does honoring entail? One must feed his parents, give them to drink, dress them, cover them, and the like. All this should be done with a smiling and radiant countenance, for even if one were to feed one’s parents stuffed ducklings every day while bearing a scowling expression, one will be punished for this. Indeed, cheer and a radiant countenance is an integral part of the Mitzvah of honoring one’s parents

To what extent must one honor one’s parents? Even if a parent takes a wallet full of gold coins belonging to the child and throws it into the sea in front of the child, the child should not humiliate them, distress them, or become angry at them; rather, he should accept this Heavenly decree and remain silent. Some say that if the child has the ability to prevent the parent from throwing the wallet into the sea, he may in fact exercise it. In any event, he may summon the parent to a Bet Din after the fact, for one is not obligated to lose money due to the Mitzvah of honoring one’s parents.

In coming Halachot we shall, G-d willing, explain the differences between honoring and revering one’s parents